What Do We Feel Guilty About?
February 4th, 2010 | 
Author: 2/4/10
Post by Kim Gibbs
Everyone who has a conscience feels guilty about something.
Maybe we feel guilty about dumb things we did as kids and never made right; about lies we’ve told to save face; about things we stole or broke and never replaced; about feelings we’ve hurt when we let people down.
When I was thirteen years old, six friends and I decided to go to Wrigley Field in downtown Chicago to watch the Cubs play baseball. As we were waiting to board the bus, someone had the brilliant idea that instead of dropping in a dime and a nickel to pay the fifteen cent fare, we could just drop in a penny and a nickel. With the hubbub of so many giggling girls getting on the bus at the same time, we figured the driver would never notice.
No sooner had we paid and gotten to the back of the bus when the driver’s voice boomed out, “Would you girls please come back up here?” He had noticed our little scheme and asked us to put in the additional amount owed.
When we all crowded to the front of the bus to pay up, it was easy for me to hide in the middle of the group and not pay my fair share, which is exactly what I did. I reasoned that if I could hide myself, I could hide my guilt. Wrong.
To this day, I feel guilty for cheating the bus company out of nine cents. Of course it’s not the nine cents that bothers me, but rather my lack of integrity, even when I was given a second chance to come clean. I guess it’s time to visit the bus station and pay a long overdue IOU. They obviously don’t need it, but I do.
Posted in Intro to Guilt | 
Tags: feel guilty, feel guilty about, feels guilty, hide my guilt, Kim Gibbs
It’s also easy to think that if we hide in the crowd we are less guilty for our actions. The lemming mentality is just an excuse to act in a way we already know is wrong instead of standing up for the right thing, no matter how hard it is.
And that’s exactly what I did. I believed in the value of honesty but fell short of living it when the pressure was on. Luckily I felt bad enough about my lack of honesty that I’ve made an extra effort toward living that value ever since!